11.
Communicate
When couples are having
problems in a relationship, communication is the first thing to stop. It is often easier to just be quiet than to get
mad. When rebuilding relationships, just as communication was the first to
stop, it now needs to be the first to start. This will require that both
individuals let down their guard and pretty much throw caution to the wind.
Healing in the relationship cannot start until you talk. Make an agreement that
you will talk about anything and everything and that you will listen, really
listen. That does not mean that you will agree with everything, which is
perfectly fine. However, if you do not agree, do not yell, rather, the two of
you need to calmly discuss the issue and together, work out a solution. This is
hard work but within a very short time, you will both feel much better,
individually and as a couple.
12. A Night of Passion
Intimacy and passion in relationships is not only important but also
healthy. Couples need to enjoy being together in an intimate way. When
relationships are troubled, the last thing either person wants is to be sexual
or passionate with each other. However, this is a part of the healing and
rebuilding of the relationship and although it might be awkward in the
beginning, it is crucial. Make your intimate time together special. Surprise
your mate with a warm bubble bath, lighted candles, soft music, and a bottle of
wine, or reserve a nice romantic evening at a local hotel to include a
wonderful candlelit dinner, fine wine, and a beautiful room.
13. Dinner Party
Start a new tradition of hosting a dinner party every other month or two
and inviting several of you and your mate ’s friends. Set up board games that
everyone will enjoy, have some light and lively music playing, and plan to have
a blast. Spending time with friends in this kind of setting is a great way to
reduce stress. When stress is low, couples get along better. This is a
wonderful way to interact with each other ’s friends as a couple.
14. Happy Birthday
As people grow older, in general, birthdays become less celebrated. Gifts
are quickly given, meals eaten, and it is over. For your mate ’s next birthday,
take some time to plan something very special. Make this a true celebration of
their life as a way of showing your love and appreciation. Every person, even
adults, like attention and love to be appreciated. Whether a surprise party or
not, your mate will be impressed that you went to all the effort just for them.
15. Secret Getaway
Plan a nice weekend getaway to some place off the beaten track where you
can enjoy some privacy. A quaint cottage or charming bed and breakfast would be
ideal choices. Scout out the area ahead of time and choose a few things that
the two of you would like to do in the area but just be sure to leave plenty of
time for you to enjoy some alone time. Order a nice bottle of wine or some hot
cappuccino and relax in front of the fire! Make this a romantic weekend where
you can rekindle your love.
16. Special Greeting
If your mate has to work late and you know he had a bad day, surprise him
with a late -night gourmet meal. When you hear him arrive home, greet him in
new, sexy lingerie, a warm kiss, and wonderful hot meal. After he picks himself
up off the floor, he will fall in love with you all over again for this
wonderful greeting. If reversed and the woman is coming home, after giving her
a lingering kiss, have her join you in the dining room where the table is set
with soft glowing candles and a wonderful meal. Have an envelope lying by her
plate that when opened, she will read, “This certificate is good for one thirty
-minute massage after dinner. ”This is how you keep romance alive!
17. Just Because
Give your mate gifts “just because. ”These do not have to be expensive
whatsoever. For example, one woman had a miniature dish collection in her
kitchen. Her husband came home and told her that he had a gift for her. Holding
out her hand, he gently placed in her hand a miniature porcelain cup with her
name neatly written in blue ink. She knew that this cup probably cost no more
than $2.00 but the thought that he would take the time to find something she enjoyed,
was worth $1 million. The small gifts packed with thought are far more cherished.
18. Say it with Words
Surprise your mate with little notes found in unexpected places. If your
mate travels for work, place a loving note somewhere in their suitcase. Perhaps
they have a long commute to work. If so, slip a note saying, “I love you, ”in
their CD case where you know they will find it. Another recommendation is
sticking a note on the bathroom mirror so this will be the first thing seen in
the morning. Be creative and have some fun with this.
19. Cuddle Time
When couples first start dating, cuddling is usually a part of their
everyday existence. However, as the relationship progresses or after children
enter the picture, the cuddling stops. Take some time just to cuddle. If your
mate is sitting on the couch watching a movie, or laying in bed reading, scoot
close and tell them that you just want to cuddle. This makes both people feel
secure and loved.
20. Breakfast in Bed
When was the last time you or your mate were served breakfast in bed?
Never? On a Saturday or Sunday, when nothing special is planned, get up a
little early and fix their favorite breakfast. Include the morning newspaper as
an added bonus. Although they may be shocked, you can be guaranteed that this
gesture of love will be appreciated.
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